July 17th

"Heaven will hold you, before we do."

On this day last year we got to see this pic of our 3 babies in one of the earliest stages of development. We were so happy and proud when we first saw this picture. These were our babies!! We felt so blessed. Unfortunately God had different plans for these babies than we did. I still wonder if each one was a boy or a girl. What would life be like right now if they had all implanted....if God would've chosen for them to live their lives on earth with us. But that was not what he planned for them, but I still "miss them everyday...miss them in everyway."

"Glory Baby" lyrics

Glory baby you slipped away as fast as we could say baby…baby..
You were growing, what happened dear?
You disappeared on us baby…baby..
Heaven will hold you before we do
Heaven will keep you safe until we’re home with you…
Until we’re home with you…

Miss you everyday
Miss you in every way
But we know there’s a
day when we will hold you
We will hold you
You’ll kiss our tears away
When we’re home to stay
Can’t wait for the day when we will see you
We will see you
But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
‘till mom and dad can hold you…
You’ll just have heaven before we do
You’ll just have heaven before we do

Sweet little babies, it’s hard to
understand it ‘cause we’re hurting
We are hurting
But there is healing
And we know we’re stronger people through the growing
And in knowing-
That all things work together for our good
And God works His purposes just like He said He would…
Just like He said He would…

BRIDGE:
I can’t imagine heaven’s lullabies
and what they must sound like
But I will rest in knowing, heaven is your home
And it’s all you’ll ever know…all you’ll ever know…

Before the Morning....

I have heard this song several times lately and it is exactly where we are at right now. God is going to bring us Joy....the pain we've been feeling won't compare to the Joy He's bringing....Thank You Jesus! We can't wait for that moment....

Prayers Needed

I would just like to ask for prayer for Rob and I. We are both really struggling. This journey is really getting hard on us. I think we both thought that once we were "waiting", it would be so much easier. But for some reason, it is so much harder. These last 3 weeks have seemed like 3 months. We are just ready to be parents and I don't know how much longer we can do this. So we would just appreciate prayer for peace and patience and that God would bring us a baby SOON! I know that last sentence sounds kinda silly but that is Rob prayed at dinner tonight and I loved it!:) It is exactly how we feel. We want to have patience but we want God to hurry up! ;) What can I say, we're human.

"When two of you get together on anything at all on earth and make a prayer of it, my Father in heaven goes into action. And when two or three of you are together because of me, you can be sure that I'll be there." Matthew 18:20 (The Message)

It's been awhile....

It has been so long since I have posted on here..... I guess there still hasn't been much to say. I have good days and then I have bad days. All of our stuff finally went up online one week ago today! That is exciting! But I cannot even begin to tell you how long one week of waiting feels. I can't imagine what this wait is going to be like. I am hoping after the first couple weeks go by it will start to get a little easier. It probably won't though:). It is just all I can think about. I guess I should say he/she is all I can think about! Every where I go..... every minute of the day....I wish our baby was already with us. Being a mom is what my heart longs for.

Our birthparent Letter

We got our our first contact this weekend! Sounds exciting, and it was, but we were suspicious from the beginning because of what this girl said in her email. It just sounded like she might have ulterior motives....and she did. We went ahead and responded and forwarded her message to our agency. On monday we got an email from IAC saying that this person had not contacted the agency but had contacted a couple other families along with us. We are always supposed to let the agency know if we get contacted. So anyway turns out this girl was telling a couple in California that her couple in Indiana had backed out because they(we) were adopting twins. Turns out she was a scammer and was out to get some money! Luckily our agency is good about protecting us from this, but it makes me wonder how many contacts we'll get like that before we are matched. Even though we thought from the beginning this might be some kinda scam, you still get a little excited. I know this is going to be a roller coaster ride but I hope it is a really short one!

We have already gotten a couple of bigger items for the baby to get them out of the way. It has been fun! We also have some clothes from friends who were wanting to get rid of them. Lets just say if we get a girl, we are set! Rob's sister has also given us some clothes and other items along with a baby papasan. We've looked at stuff but aren't officially registering until we are matched.

Baby Culross' bed

Baby culross' dresser and papasan chair and the bear in the chair is the baby's(from my mom for christmas) also

Well I don't have much else to say. I'll try to update if anything is going on. Hopefully we have some excitement soon!

We're getting close!

Just thought I would update since it has been a little while. I just feel like there hasn't been much to say lately. But we are moving forward now! We got our Home Study in the mail a few days ago and it is done and approved!! Now we just have to finish up our website and our birthparent letter and get them approved and we will be "actively" waiting!! And we are getting close!!! I can't wait! All I can do these days is dream about our baby! It is all so exciting, and emotional, and a little stressful too! I am sure it is only going to be all those things and more as we wait. I trust God's plan so much though, that I know it will all be ok. It will be AMAZING!

Oh yeah we ended up choosing pic #2. We appreciate all of your input! We decided that this pic shows most accurately who we are. Hopefully it stands out to a birthparent out there!

Vote for your favorite

We took some pictures while we were visiting our parents in Florida and are trying to figure out which one to use for our main adoption profile pic. So we want to know what you all think!! Which picture is the most inviting pic? If you were a mama that was choosing an adoption plan for your baby, what pic do you think would stand out to you?? :)

Pic #1

Pic #2

Pic #3

Pic #4

Leave a comment and tell us what you think!! Thanks so much!

Run Mama Run!

Rob got me a very special gift for Christmas. I had been wanting a new ipod because mine was getting old enough that it wouldn't hold it's charge for very long. Since I was wanting to run a marathon sometime this year, I needed one that would at least stay charged for 4 hours. I have been telling Rob for awhile that I like to imagine the day that I am running a race and he is there cheering me on with our baby. I say, "I could just imagine you and the baby and the baby wearing a little shirt that says, "my mommy is faster than your mommy!". So anyway we didn't get each other anything for Christmas, but when we were opening presents with my family there was a present without a name on it and Rob says, "oh that is for you from your mom." I was like, "oh, ok." I opened it up and I was so confused as to why my mom got me an ipod. My mom had given us money because we said that is what we'd like to have to put towards stuff for the baby. Needless to say, it was from Rob and when I looked over at him, he had a big smile on his face. And when I took it outta the box and looked at the back, this is what it said......

So now everyday when I go to run, I look at the back of this and get so excited about that day when my dream will come true!

I have just started training for the annual mini-marathon here in Indy. That is in May. And then I signed up for my very first Marathon!! I am going to run the Chicago Marathon in October!!